Quacker News daily superautomated ai tech-bro mockery | github | podcast
1. So you think you know box shadows? (dgerrells.com)
**Tech Blogger Unravels the Sorcery of Box Shadows**
In a riveting display of unnecessary graphical excess, dgerrells.com plunges into the misunderstood art of abusing CSS box shadows, pushing the limits of both browser patience and design sensibility. 🎨🤦‍♂️ With an M1 chip and a reckless disregard for web performance, the author joyously shares how to cripple your site's loading time with janky effects on a single div. Meanwhile, commenters engage in a tragicomic display of techno-jargon, flexing their GPU knowledge to rationalize why their web pages look like a PowerPoint slide from 1998. No practical application here—just geeky showboating and niche-ridden debate making the comments section an unparalleled spectator sport. 🍿👾 High fives all around for making the simple complicated!
483 points by yohannesk 2024-07-21T12:38:39 | 68 comments
2. rr – record and replay debugger for C/C++ (rr-project.org)
**rr – the Time-Traveling Debugger You Didn’t Ask For But Definitely Need**

Welcome, brave souls, to the magical realm of rr, the unparalleled debugger that seeks to send you spinning back through your code as if you're a second-rate Doctor Who. Tools like this promise to save developers from their buggy nightmares, encapsulating all the pain of a crash in a neat little recording you can play over and over, because obviously, watching your code fail once isn’t enough. 🔄💥

In the dust-filled corners of online forums, developers spar over the virtues of rr versus the ancient arts of GDB's reverse debugging. Some claims escalate so quickly you might think they're debugging the fabric of reality itself. "My dev box never runs out of RAM!" one chants, clutching their pearls and 64GB of ego, while another mutters darkly about overhead percentages like a warlock cursing in hex code. Debugger wars, because what else are you going to do at 3 AM?
317 points by levzettelin 2024-07-21T08:54:13 | 110 comments
3. Glisp: Graphical Lisp (glisp.app)
In the latest round of mechanically reinventing the wheel, the internet stumbles upon Glisp: Graphical Lisp, an adventure in dragging UI elements around to pretend you're coding. Innovative! Or so says a developer who apparently just discovered that SVGs can be manipulated with Lisp-like syntax. Meanwhile, enthusiasts in the comments reinvent their own wheels, comparing everything from ancient LOGO languages to obscure live coding tools, while desperately trying to find philosophical depth in dragging shapes around a screen. "Great project," cries one user, likely echoing their satisfaction in finding yet another way to avoid traditional software development. 🎨🤖
108 points by lioeters 2024-07-21T16:34:18 | 8 comments
4. What is the significance of the character "j" at the end of a Roman Numeral? (2013) (genealogy.stackexchange.com)
Genealogy enthusiasts and self-declared linguists collide in a spectacular display of extremely niche knowledge, scrutinizing the significance of the letter "j" in Roman numerals with all the intensity of a toddler spelling out their name for the first time. Commenters dive into an exhilarating exploration of the Dutch digraph 'ij', turning a simple typographical query into a full-blown cultural, historical, and phonetic odyssey — because why not complicate things? Amidst the excited albeit baffling discourse, a brave few attempt to connect these revelations to their personal anecdotes, heroically tying Jan's and Yvonne’s mispronounced mishaps to the grander scheme of Dutch alphabetical reforms. Clearly, the path to understanding the enigma of the Roman numeral system is paved with digraphs, mispronunciations, and a sprinkle of existential despair over educational reforms. 📚🔍
405 points by kamaraju 2024-07-21T05:31:59 | 158 comments
5. A brief history of Dell Unix (2008) (technologists.com)
Title: Rediscovering the Lost City of Dell UNIX

In a thrilling display of digital archaeology, technologists.com offers a dizzying update on Dell UNIX, complete with 256 color display graphics that must have the ghost of Steve Jobs swirling in envy. As if spun from the fabric of ancient enchanted tape drives, a commenter heroically name-drops past coworkers in a bewitching attempt to summon the spirits of UNIX developers long gone. Meanwhile, others veer off into tangents about their own Linux misadventures, setting off a tragic comedic opera of support calls and misshipped hardware. True to the nature of tech forums, existential questions about long-lost forum acquaintances dominate the discourse, proving nothing fuels nostalgia quite like an obsolete UNIX version on misplaced hardware.
81 points by fanf2 2024-07-21T14:42:02 | 7 comments
6. Show QN: Shade/Bs – Modern Web UIs Without Node.js (masoftware.net)
**Hackers Rejoint the Retro Revolution in Modern Disguise**

In a dazzling display of technological backwardness thinly veiled as innovation, the web development community at Hacker News loses its collective mind over "shade/bs", a groundbreaking solution for those who find the 1990s too futuristic. This modern miracle of a bootstrap component theme promises to liberate the masses from the oppressive chains of Javascript frameworks, enabling the creation of "reactive SPAs" that nobody asked for—using *hypermedia*, no less! Cue the raucous applause from commenters fawning over yet another way to make web development as convoluted as possible, while eagerly anticipating "more examples" like kids at a low-budget magic show. 🎩✨ Meanwhile, *real* developers just update their dependencies and get back to work.
5 points by mannders 2024-07-21T23:28:01 | 0 comments
7. James C. Scott, author of Seeing Like a State, has died (poast.org)
**James C. Scott Passes, Internet Misunderstands His Work Ironically**

In a tragic twist of fate, James C. Scott, the luminary behind "Seeing Like a State," is no longer with us, prompting legions of commentators to showcase their unique blend of superficial reading comprehension and eagerness to relate everything back to tech. One avid fan equates state control mechanisms with app permissions—as if reducing centuries of sociopolitical theory to software development settings is peak insight. Another enlightens us by confusing diversity in software "featuresets" with security issues, complete with a fascinatingly irrelevant anecdote about hacked build systems. Meanwhile, a history major reminisces about college days, unwittingly proving that nostalgia is just history seen through rose-colored filters. As the internet does its best to intellectualize and warp Scott's intricate ideas into bite-sized misinterpretations, one can only hope the irony isn't lost in the digital void. 😂
73 points by FreakLegion 2024-07-21T22:33:29 | 9 comments
8. Microsoft points finger at the EU for not being able to lock down Windows (neowin.net)
**Microsoft Blames EU for Its Windows Issues: A Shocker!**

In a thrilling twist no one saw coming, Microsoft shifts blame onto the EU for preventing a total lockdown of their sieve-like Windows OS. As if rehearsed in a bad soap opera, a Microsoft spokesperson dramatically revealed to the *Wall Street Journal* that the big bad EU is stopping their heroic efforts to "secure" Windows. Commenters, diving into their usual tech-expert modes, argue over the impact of bad drivers like they're debating the finer points of quantum physics. Forget about actual security concerns, let's argue semantics and hypothetical scenarios until we're all blue-screened! 🤦‍♏️
16 points by mywacaday 2024-07-22T00:03:36 | 9 comments
9. Mining JIT traces for missing optimizations with Z3 (pypy.org)
**Mining JIT Game of Optimization Bingo with Z3**

In a tech saga that nobody asked for but everybody got, CF Bolz-Tereick decides the world needs to scrape JIT traces for inefficiencies like a digital raccoon going through the garbage bins of PyPy's optimizer. In the comments, armchair programmers oscillate between microscopic critiques ("Is this a typo?") and existential queries about AI's role in coding optimizations—because clearly, scripting inefficiencies is now an AI's job, except for when it’s not. Meanwhile, a history lesson unfolds on the aging techniques of JIT as nostalgic programmers reminisce over "the good old days" of simpler code times. Tune in next week for another episode of "Optimizing the Optimizer: Why Do It Smarter When You Can Do It Harder?" 🤖💾🔧
95 points by matt_d 2024-07-20T17:56:57 | 32 comments
10. txtai: Open-source vector search and RAG for minimalists (neuml.github.io)
Welcome to the cutting-edge world of txtai, an all-in-one embeddings database perfect for hobbyists aiming to make their D&D sessions searchable like a Google for the magically inclined. Eager devs dive into comments, fumbling around with whether to use RAG, extracting Elminster's entire life story without a hitch, or just opening a good old PDF themselves. Someone, helpfully, spams a link to their "smooth" txtai project, coyly mentioning just how underwhelming other tools are—because, you know, simplicity equates to superiority in the software jungle. Meanwhile, another commenter dreams of running RAG without a GPU, proving that you can indeed try to bake a cake without an oven.
108 points by dmezzetti 2024-07-21T11:39:11 | 17 comments
11. Polymorphic Shellcode (2023) (neugierig.org)
In a thrilling display of digital archeology, a brave blogger at neugierig.org dives headfirst into the "exhilarating" world of polymorphic shellcode, apparently discovering its existence just after watching a high-brow Twitter poll. 😂 Fear not, dear reader, for our intrepid explorer promises to dumb it down enough so even you, yes YOU, can grasp the sophisticated art of cybersecurity jargon. Commenters leap into action to one-up each other with half-baked tales of their own pixels of glory from the golden days of dial-up conquests, because nothing says "hacker" like flexing in blog comments. Strap in for more self-aggrandizing discourse where everyone definitely knows more than you do. 🙄
4 points by evmar 2024-07-16T18:17:55 | 0 comments
12. Inkbase: Programmable Ink (2022) (inkandswitch.com)
Title: "Inkbase: The Revolutionary Art of Reinventing the Wheel"

In an audacious display of originality, Inkbase revives ancient technology by daring to combine the concept of writing with digital devices, heralding an avant-garde future where one can both write AND calculate on a screen. Our enlightened tech hobbyists dive into the comments with all the fervor of Columbus discovering Ohio, musing deeply on pressing existential crises like infinite canvases, squeezing the last ounce of utility from their digital pens, and the titanic struggle between pressing a tiny color selection target. Connoisseurs of redundant tech debates helpfully discuss migrating from Notability to Goodnotes as if swapping deck chairs on the Titanic, each claiming superiority in this post-post-paper apocalypse. Meanwhile, dreams of the monumental capability to drag programming elements in Ryven.org or crafting grand theories on digital napkins continue to inflate the digital ether, soaring far beyond the grasp of mundane office stationery.
108 points by surprisetalk 2024-07-16T14:06:51 | 18 comments
13. Continue (YC S23) Is Hiring a Software Engineer in San Francisco (ycombinator.com)
**YC’s Latest Unicorn Wannabe Begs for Code Minions**

In a groundbreaking display of self-delusion, the startup "Continue" (because *why not* pick a verb for a company name?) is now trawling for software engineers who can transform spaghetti code into slightly less embarrassing spaghetti code. They seek a "rigorous" coder with a love for "rapid experimentation" — which is obviously Silicon Valley speak for "do it fast and pray it works." Prospective hires should be thrilled at the vagueness of “doing whatever is required,” hinting at a thrilling future of 80-hour weeks under the guise of "empowering developers." Comment sections are predictably ablaze with keyboard warriors asserting code messiahs will save the world, apparently by making autocomplete slightly less infuriating. 🙄
0 points by 2024-07-21T21:02:30 | 0 comments
14. Stremio OS Is Now Available for Raspberry Pi 5 and 4 (stremio.com)
In a world where redundancy is the spice of life, the revolutionary Stremio OS graces not one, but two versions of the Raspberry Pi. Brace yourselves, tech enthusiasts and homebrew media pirates alike, as you witness another media center promising to seamlessly consolidate your borderline illegal streaming activities. Commenters, torn between confusion and misplaced enthusiasm, engage in a tale as old as time: "Is this even new?" "Why does it buffer more than my 90s dial-up?" Meanwhile, one brave soul, armed with a year of loyalty to Stremio, pledges allegiance to this ambiguous newcomer—probably the only person ready to gamble their Raspberry Pi on this exciting venture. 🎬🍿🐢
26 points by commoner 2024-07-21T17:39:52 | 7 comments
15. Rosey Grier: From NFL Football to Knitting and Needlework (2023) (crochetconcupiscence.com)
In an astounding twist of fate that could only occur on the internet, crochetconcupiscence.com manages to peak our collective disbelief by chronicling Rosey Grier’s journey from NFL brute to knitting nanny. Who knew that swapping pigskins for pincushions could provide such fodder for endless, insufferable commentary? Readers, mostly those who still think "real men don’t knit", tumble out of the woodwork to express their shock, awe, and unsolicited opinions on traditional gender roles. Ultimately, everyone learns a crucial lesson: the internet never forgets, and neither does grandma.
13 points by DoreenMichele 2024-07-16T18:47:34 | 0 comments
16. French Acrobatic Artist’s Low-Gravity Invention (core77.com)

Behold French Innovations: Acrobatic Moon Shoes!


In a stunning display of ignoring decades of existing technology, French "acrobatical" wizard Bastien Dausse has reinvented the (moon)wheel with his anti-gravity device that claims to replicate lunar frolicking. 🌑 Dausse's contraption, a marvel in the arts of redundancy, is apparently cooler because it’s simpler and, crucially, French. Meanwhile, in the still-trying-to-be-helpful comment section, viewers engage in a duet of "been there, done that" and not-so-subtle plugs for other YouTube inventors. 🎪


Because who needs NASA or physics when you have an acrobat and a dream?

39 points by halfdaft 2024-07-21T21:15:04 | 6 comments
17. PgManage: Modern, cross platform graphical database client (github.com/commandprompt)
Title: PgManage: An Ode to Redundancy and Minimal Connectivity

First Paragraph: In an exhilarating leap backwards, PgManage emerges as the new hero for anyone who craves the nostalgia of limited database connectivity and the thrill of manual documentation scavenger hunts. The soaring aspirations of handling Postgres databases with a "modern" GUI collide spectacularly with the mundane reality of not supporting unix sockets, leaving users in an emotional turmoil paralleled only by the drama in the comment section. Fans of the defunct OmniDB might find solace in PgManage’s debugger, a relic of an age when software frustrations were a rite of passage. Skeptics and enthusiasts alike spar in the comments, trying to ascertain whether PgManage is just a shadow of PgAdmin or a beacon of missed potential. 🎭💔
111 points by thunderbong 2024-07-21T12:20:13 | 39 comments
18. The Plague of Lust: A History of Venereal Disease in Antiquity (1901 Edition) (publicdomainreview.org)
Title: An Itchy Look into Togas and Tumults

In the digital catacombs of Public Domain Review, the bold adventurers of internet academia have unearthed a dusty gem: "The Plague of Lust." Dr. Julius Rosenbaum, a man deeply intrigued by the nether itches of antiquity, dedicates an entire book to the sores and secrets of ancient loins. It’s a gritty tale where Greek husbands perilously leap from chaste marital beds into the dangerous laps of "slave-women" to avoid – God forbid – the monotony of monogamy. Amidst Rosenbaum's tour of ancient venereal escapades, commenters, wielding their half-baked Google PhDs, duel over mistranslations and misattributions, proving once again that the internet is humanity's true den of iniquity. 🤓📜🔍
16 points by Petiver 2024-07-19T18:15:43 | 3 comments
19. Show QN: Moocable – find people studying the same online course/book (moocable.com)
Title: Moocable.com: For When You Absolutely, Positively Have To Find Another Procrastinator Pretending to Learn Online

In a world where solitary confinement isn't enough for self-learners, Moocable.com emerges as a beacon of unnecessary social interaction. Now, armchair scholars have a new digital playground to discover others who can also pretend to study the same online course or book. Comment sections explode with the joy of adding niche courses not already dominated by two other keen learners, while others celebrate the groundbreaking realization that adding standardized tags like 'timezone' might just prevent you from coordinating with someone who's tomorrow today. Meanwhile, someone's still stuck on the Safari loading screen – perhaps a metaphor for their educational journey. 😅🎓
58 points by junaid_97 2024-07-21T13:34:17 | 15 comments
20. The data that powers AI is disappearing fast (nytimes.com)
In an alarming trend only noticed by the brightest minds at nytimes.com, the world's supply of data — which, like oil or clean oxygen, is obviously irreplaceable — is vanishing at an unprecedented rate. Tech aficionados in the comments, skimming the article during their arduous 15-minute Silicon Valley commutes, nod sagely at the imminent demise of all AI everywhere, while simultaneously debating which data-deprived AI bot is still smart enough to manage their crypto portfolios. 📉🤖 As each commenter vies for the crown of "Most Profound Thought-Leader in a Virtual Echo Chamber," the internet collectively prays for a day when the only things disappearing faster than data are these comments.
77 points by sgammon 2024-07-21T19:05:36 | 105 comments
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