| 1. |
|
▲ Boeing Starliner launches first crewed mission (bbc.co.uk)
On a day that will be remembered for nothing more than its glaring mediocrity, Boeing attempts to distract us from its past debacles by hurling a few brave souls into the void in what they call the "Starliner." As if stumbling through a cosmic reminder that being second fiddle to SpaceX is an overachievement, Boeing’s latest firework has remarkably managed to not explode on the launch pad. The comment sections are ablaze with aerospace "experts" whose closest encounter with orbital mechanics is failing to install Kerbal Space Program. Despite their limited grasp on reality, they ecstatically parrot phrases like "historic milestone" and “space age” while managing to simultaneously solve complex engineering problems from their mom's basements. Truly, a giant leap for armchair astronaut kind. 🚀💥
|
|
456 points by helsinkiandrew
2024-06-05T15:04:03 |
449 comments
|
|
| 2. |
|
▲ Vulkan1.3 on the M1 in one month (rosenzweig.io)
In yet another epoch-marking techno feat only really understood by four people, today’s *Sherlock Compsci* garanties that Vulkan 1.3 can, indeed, run on Apple’s M1 chip within a month – somehow suggesting computing has transcended into new heights. Brace yourselves as the comment section transforms into a fiery pit where self-proclaimed tech prophets chant the liturgy of performance benchmarks and the heresy of using anything but native APIs. 🚀🍏💻 Hilarity ensues as battles erupt over obscure compiler flags, accompanied by an occasional nostalgic ode to simpler interfaces. Oh, and everyone is absolutely certain they could’ve done it better and faster. Typical.
|
|
555 points by todsacerdoti
2024-06-05T15:11:01 |
199 comments
|
|
| 3. |
|
▲ Mathematical Optimization for Cargo Ships (research.google)
In a breathtaking display of Silicon Valley hubris, researchers at Google have decided that the real problem with global commerce isn't labor practices or environmental impact, but *how mathematically optimized* our cargo ships are. As if Mother Nature herself was lying awake at night, yearning for a few extra equations to solve her woes. The comment section, as expected, is a circus of armchair admirals and weekend mathematicians, all convinced they could cut it as the next Archimedes if only they weren't so busy arguing online. Amid dense fog of jargon and self-importance, consensus emerges: cargo ships simply need more calculus.
|
|
98 points by alphabetting
2024-06-05T00:00:42 |
38 comments
|
|
| 4. |
|
▲ For sale replica of the mustang aircraft (scalewings.com)
Title: Hobbyists Clamor Over Expensive Adult Toy
Summary: Relive the glories of yesteryare with the SW-51, a costly yet alluring replica that lets affluent hobbyists pretend to be wartime heroes without leaving the comfort of their luxury bunkers. Commenters, swirling in a hot mix of one-upmanship and nostalgia, fervently argue over which historically inaccurate paint job is the most authentic. They joyously spend what could be a small nation's healthcare budget on what amounts to a very elaborate paperweight. Meanwhile, the rest of the world watches, bemused, as grown men mimic dogfights in the sky, pausing only to correct each other's misuse of World War II jargon. 🛩️💸
|
|
28 points by Harmohit
2024-06-05T22:25:02 |
31 comments
|
|
| 5. |
|
▲ DHCPv6-PD – First Steps (sha256.net)
Title: DHCPv6-PD – Old Dogs Learn New Tricks, Sort Of
Summary: In a shocking revelation at sha256.net, a blogger finally caves to peer pressure and decides to join the 21st century by setting up DHCPv6-PD, using a setup that sounds suspiciously like your grandfather's tool shed. Armed with a "donated" Fritz!Box 6660 (because buying modern equipment is for amateurs), they embark on a journey described with the excitement typically reserved for watching paint dry. Meanwhile, the commenters, in an dazzling display of missing the point, argue over which obsolete piece of tech qualifies as the best makeshift solution, turning the comment section into an unintentional satire of itself. Truly, it’s the blind leading the blind, but with more IP addresses.
|
|
26 points by todsacerdoti
2024-06-05T22:07:27 |
6 comments
|
|
| 6. |
|
▲ Show QN: Original 8x16 ASCII Fixed Width Font: Classic Console Neue (webdraft.hu)
Title: Hacker News Learns About Fonts
Today on Hacker News, the denizens discover the art of typography with an earth-shattering 8x16 font that resembles every default terminal font ever created. While some users can't see the "Matrix Digital Rain Animation" because they've bravely turned off JavaScript to avoid CIA-grade tracking, others are busy arguing the esoteric merits of pixel widths as if they were debating the ethics of gene splicing. Delight in the predictable chaos that ensues when tech aficionados pretend they can distinguish between font characters finer than their grasp of regular social cues. ⌨️👓💥
|
|
31 points by deejayy
2024-06-05T21:35:53 |
10 comments
|
|
| 7. |
|
▲ Jury Finds Boeing Stole Tech from Electric Airplane Startup (govtech.com)
In a stunning display of corporate surprise, a jury has decided that Boeing, a small, indie company you might not have heard of, actually took some shiny tech ideas from a cute little electric airplane startup. Desperate commenters, their keyboards blazing with indignation, cry out for 👏justice👏, apparently unaware that the only thing more capitalist than stealing ideas is whining about it on the internet. Somewhere, an exec is considering whether to frame the lawsuit as a motivational poster for his office. 🚀👀
|
|
41 points by rmason
2024-06-05T20:02:57 |
2 comments
|
|
| 8. |
|
▲ Largest Autonomous Ride-Hail Territory in US Now Even Larger (waymo.com)
In a groundbreaking achievement that terrifies exactly nobody, Waymo announces the expansion of their driverless dominion to cover even more unsuspecting suburban zones. Behold the future: a realm where your robot overlords can't parallel park but can now roam over additional square miles of strip-malls and sad diners. Commenters, in a dazzling display of missing the point, are embroiled in a neurotic tech-worship versus tech-dread debate, deftly ignoring the fact that their autonomous overlords still can’t make it through a drive-thru. 🤖🚗💨
|
|
37 points by xnx
2024-06-05T20:59:33 |
22 comments
|
|
| 9. |
|
▲ We improved the performance of a userspace TCP stack in Go (coder.com)
In a groundbreaking display of technological overachievement, a team has managed to squeeze extra performance out of a userspace TCP stack by writing it in Go, because obviously what the internet needs is more Go. Commenters, erupting in ecstasy, trip over their keyboards to praise the profound innovation of reinventing existing technology slightly slower but in a trendier language. Critics are quickly dismissed by fierce guardians of the Go cult, armed with their trusty battle cry: "But the concurrency!" Meanwhile, the rest of the programming world gazes on, bewildered, clutching their C manuals and wondering when making things more complicated became a substitute for actual progress. 🐢💨
|
|
130 points by infomaniac
2024-06-05T16:13:39 |
70 comments
|
|
| 10. |
|
▲ Show QN: Foosbar – My autonomous foosball-playing robot (github.com/misprit7)
In yet another world-changing breakthrough, Hacker News presents Foosbar, an autonomous foosball-playing robot designed to prevent humans from ever touching the actual table. A tech enthusiast, who evidently has too much free time, has taken it upon themselves to ensure our future overlords can beat us at bar games. Commenters are torn between hailing this as the pinnacle of human achievement and meticulously arguing about the potential for foosball scholarships for underprivileged AI. Meanwhile, others are busy asking the truly important questions like whether the robot can be programmed to trash talk or serve beer.
|
|
200 points by misprit7
2024-06-05T15:16:50 |
63 comments
|
|
| 11. |
|
▲ Implementing the Goodfellow GANs paper (ym2132.github.io)
Once again, the GitHub repositories blossom with yet another reincarnation of an artificial intelligence marvel nobody truly understands, courtesy of Yusuf Mohammad's weekend project on Goodfenary GANs. On a blog that looks like it was designed by an adversarial neural network itself, Yusuf regurgitates Ian Goodfellow’s seminal GANs paper with all the finesse of a script kiddie explaining blockchain at a dinner party. The few brave souls who venture into the comments section either pretend to applaud the effort with as much desperation as a drowning man clings to a lifebuoy, or ask questions that clearly illustrate they've mistaken GANs for some new energy drink. Welcome to the echo chamber of AI echo chambers, where the blind lead the blind into the next deep learning pitfall, festooned with Python scripts and unchecked optimism.
|
|
47 points by Two_hands
2024-06-04T22:21:30 |
4 comments
|
|
| 12. |
|
▲ FBI raids Atlanta corporate landlord in probe of rental market price fixing (ajc.com)
Today on the web's premier bastion of cluelessness, a riveting tale of corporate landlord drama unfolds as the FBI cracks the door on Atlanta's rental market scheming. Predictably, armchair economists flood the comments section, each vying for the Nobel in Backyard Economics, theorizing how *their* half-baked solution could have single-handedly prevented corporate greed. 🕵️♂️📈 In the midst of the turmoil, a lone genius proposes solving price fixing by simply "not renting" – because clearly, living in your car is the pinnacle of market protest. Way to stick it to the man, keyboard warriors!
|
|
36 points by heavyset_go
2024-06-05T22:55:05 |
6 comments
|
|
| 13. |
|
▲ Minimalistic Beat Maker (martinwecke.de)
In another stunning display of digital noise-making, someone has created a "Minimalistic Beat Maker" that allows users to click buttons and pretend they're the next Kanye, much to the dismay of actual musicians everywhere. Visitors excitedly mash their keyboards, pumping out beats that would make a 1980s Casio keyboard cringe. In the comments, an eclectic mix of "sound aficionados" argue over whether pressing a square that goes "boop" is more artistically compelling than the one that goes "beep." 🎹🙉 Grab your headphones – or maybe don't.
|
|
126 points by ambigious7777
2024-06-05T06:43:45 |
31 comments
|
|
| 14. |
|
▲ Show QN: Laudspeaker – Open-source mobile push, SMS and email automation (github.com/laudspeaker)
Laudspeaker, the latest innovation in harassing every human with a smartphone, trots into Hacker News armed with promises of "open-source" annoyance. The creators proudly announce that they *actually read* feedback, an unheard-of novelty in tech development. Commenters, thrilled to find a new toy for their automation arsenals, fall over themselves debating the ethics of push notifications at 3 AM and the pivotal role of SMS in the upcoming AI apocalypse. No doubt, civilization is saved once again by another GitHub repository. 🚀😂
|
|
115 points by abe94
2024-06-05T14:52:37 |
24 comments
|
|
| 15. |
|
▲ How big a deal was the Industrial Revolution? (2017) (lukemuehlhauser.com)
Title: Armchair Historian Tinkers with Time
In a stunning display of having too much time on his hands, Luke Muehlhauser unleashes his "personal project" about the Industrial Revolution, a safe topic that surely no one has ever discussed before. Amidst the thrilling disclaimer that his musings do not reflect Open Phil's views (because they apparently have standards), Luke dives deep into history with the vigor of a first-year philosophy student discovering Nietzsche. The comments section quickly becomes a battleground where every self-proclaimed historian and part-time economist argues fiercely over details as minor as the brand of James Watt's underwear, proving once again that the Internet remains the best place to witness people confusing confidence with competence. 😂🎩🚂
|
|
27 points by babelfish
2024-06-05T18:28:53 |
7 comments
|
|
| 16. |
|
▲ Win for copyright user rights in Canada: Digital locks do not trump fair dealing (michaelgeist.ca)
In a stupefying twist of legal jargon and common sense, a Canadian court decides that digital locks can't just override fair dealing because big media corporations feel like it. Armchair lawyers on michaelgeist.ca celebrate by misunderstanding both copyright and basic principles of law, throwing around phrases like "precedent" and "fair use" as if they were confetti at a copyright parade. Revelers fail to realize the decision barely impacts their daily piracy marathons. Truly a monumental day for anyone deeply invested in the edge case intersections of copyright law and their basement-level legal expertise.
|
|
191 points by peutetre
2024-06-04T03:34:34 |
36 comments
|
|
| 17. |
|
▲ JSON extra uses orjson instead of ujson (2019) (github.com/pydantic)
In an earth-shattering development that will surely rewrite the annals of programming history, a brave coder dares to use orjson instead of ujson in the latest GitHub spectacle. Commenters, in a display of unmatched expertise, dissect this monumental decision with the critical acuity of a soggy cracker, offering insights like "ujson is faster in my 2003 laptop setup" and "what's json?" Meanwhile, the repository's polite assurance, "We read every piece of feedback," quietly echoes into the void, grappling for relevance in a sea of semi-colon aficionados. 🙄
|
|
13 points by arvindh-manian
2024-06-05T23:02:57 |
5 comments
|
|
| 18. |
|
▲ What no one has seen before: gravitational waveforms from warp drive collapse (arxiv.org)
In an astonishing feat of academic frivolity, a bold researcher at arxiv.org claims to have documented the gravitational wobbles created when a warp drive, known only to exist in science fiction, theoretically implodes. The physics community waits with bated breath, clutching their Star Trek DVDs as foundational texts. Meanwhile, the comments section becomes a battleground where self-proclaimed geniuses duel with the ferocity of toddlers fighting over a broken toy, each one desperate to prove they thought of it first. Absolutely groundbreaking work—if your ground is made of speculative technobabble and dreams.
|
|
119 points by raattgift
2024-06-05T13:29:06 |
64 comments
|
|
| 19. |
|
▲ Regular, Recursive, Restricted (matklad.github.io)
On the hallowed grounds of matklad.github.io, a brave soul ventures to untangle the Gordian knot of describing infix expressions with formal grammars. Cue a crescendo of keyboard warriors, each brandishing their favorite obscure computational theory, falling over themselves to demonstrate intellectual superiority rather than solve practical problems. Discussions quickly spiral into a recursive descent into pedantry, leaving any hope of useful conclusions as restricted as a Chomsky Type-0 grammar. Watch as everyone misses the point in a glorious display of academic one-upmanship! 🎓🌀
|
|
27 points by todsacerdoti
2024-06-04T12:03:24 |
8 comments
|
|
| 20. |
|
▲ Building a serverless secured dead drop (ayende.com)
In a breathtaking display of over-engineering for even the simplest of tasks, a brave keyboard warrior at ayende.com unveils his latest contraption: a serverless secured dead drop. Because why just pass notes under the table when you can involve AWS Lambda, encryption algorithms, and three different kinds of database management systems? The comments section, a delightful cesspool of buzzword bingo champions, competes fiercely to suggest even more convoluted solutions while simultaneously missing the point. It’s like watching neon-drenched hamsters trying to reinvent the wheel—on the blockchain. ⛓️🐹
|
|
67 points by ayende
2024-06-04T05:51:26 |
29 comments
|
|
