| 1. |
|
▲ Show QN: I made a puzzle game that gently introduces my favorite math mysteries (rahulilango.com)
Title: Show HN: Yet Another Groundbreaking Distraction
In today's episode of Hacker News theatre, an enterprising spirit decides the pandemic isn't quite over and that we surely haven't suffered enough, so they introduce a puzzle game about coloring maps. Because if there's anything that screams "solve me during your lunch break," it’s embedding the four-color theorem into a game designed to eat up the scant free time you pretend to have. Commenters, in a display of critical thought that likely skips their day jobs, dive into heated debates about whether "math" or "coloring" offer a more profound escape from their existential dread. 🌈📐
|
|
556 points by MCSP
2024-06-20T15:45:19 |
114 comments
|
|
| 2. |
|
▲ Fuzz Map (fuzzmap.io)
Today in the hallowed halls of web fury, fuzzmap.io launches, promising to revolutionize the way we comprehend useless data. Self-proclaimed tech "pioneers" are wetting themselves in excitement over what is essentially a glorified scatter plot. Meanwhile, the ever-enlightened comment section debaters argue with the ferocity of toddlers vying for the last cookie, each convinced their misunderstanding of statistics is superior. As usual, reality sits quietly in the corner, completely ignored.
|
|
136 points by PaulHoule
2024-06-20T18:59:34 |
7 comments
|
|
| 3. |
|
▲ How babies and young children learn to understand language (lithub.com)
Title: Hobbyist Linguists Rediscover Children Babble, Warm Hearts On The Internet
Content: The intellectuals over at lithub have graced us with a revelation that could shake the very foundations of parenthood and dusty academic lounges alike: children, in their doughy, unpredictable manner, *actually* learn language as they grow. Forget the complex debates on ontogeny or the philosophical meanderings about human evolution – what truly matters is that someone has pointed out, yet again, that small humans start knowing nothing and can, indeed, learn things. Commenters, in a dazzling display of observational comedy, seem split between congratulating themselves on understanding the thesis they skimmed and irrelevant anecdotes about their own linguistic toddlers, proving once more that the internet is the best place to miss a point with confidence and vigor. ✨👶🎓💬
|
|
18 points by Hooke
2024-06-20T23:19:40 |
5 comments
|
|
| 4. |
|
▲ Tetris Font (erikdemaine.org)
In a world desperate for the next trivial distraction, a brave soul at erikdemaine.org unveils the *Tetris Font*, a groundbreaking fusion of typography and 1980s Soviet puzzle-based torment. Watch in amazement as adults with advanced degrees spend hours figuring out how to spell "T-E-T-R-I-S" using blocks that were clearly never designed to be part of the alphabet. 🕹️ In the comments section, self-proclaimed "font enthusiasts" and "gamers" collide, each convinced of their superior understanding of squares. It's the blind leading the blind through a maze built out of their childhood nostalgia and a startling lack of graphic design skills.
|
|
555 points by Bluestein
2024-06-20T11:11:16 |
79 comments
|
|
| 5. |
|
▲ Tesla owners file class-action alleging repair, parts monopoly (driving.ca)
Today on the internet: A flock of Tesla owners, whose previous engineering experience apparently revolves entirely around choosing Spotify playlists, have somehow mustered the collective brainpower to file a class-action lawsuit. They allege that Saint Elon is running a parts monopoly, because, clearly, waiting two months for a bespoke headlight reflector made from the tears of short-sellers is totally unreasonable. Commenters erupt in tribal warfare, alternating between calling Musk the reincarnation of Leonardo da Vinci and decrying him as a capitalist overlord. Who will win? Definitely the lawyers.
|
|
48 points by RickJWagner
2024-06-21T00:06:21 |
10 comments
|
|
| 6. |
|
▲ Atkinson Dithering (2021) (beyondloom.com)
**The Revolutionary Rectangle: An Epic Tale of 512x342 Glory**
In this riveting nostalgia-fest, we discover how the Macintosh's monochrome monitor wasn’t just a display but a portal back to simpler times. Commenters, in a heroic effort to seem technically savvy, bicker over the merits of 1980s pixel dimensions as though they're revealing deep, life-altering secrets. Breathlessly, they argue whether you can truly appreciate the genius of Atkinson Dithering if you haven’t soldered your own motherboard or lived through the Great Graphics Wars. Witness this exciting collision between trivial old-school tech specs and modern egos trying desperately to prove their geek cred. 🤓🕹️
|
|
182 points by jdblair
2024-06-20T15:18:27 |
76 comments
|
|
| 7. |
|
▲ Gilead shot prevents all HIV cases in trial (bloomberg.com)
In a stunning showcase of scientific achievement that just might distract from the rampant price-gouging, Gilead announces a shot that stops HIV in its tracks. The comment section, predictably, transforms into a battleground where armchair epidemiologists and weekend virologists clash swords over vaccine efficacy, Big Pharma conspiracies, and shockingly, avocado toast. Who knew that preventing a devastating virus could lead to such a glorious display of Keyboard Warrior Olympics? Indeed, more popcorn-worthy than the trial itself. 🍿🥊
|
|
363 points by toomuchtodo
2024-06-20T19:12:00 |
133 comments
|
|
| 8. |
|
▲ More Disabled Americans Are Employed, Thanks to Remote Work (bloomberg.com)
In an unexpected twist that has shaken the core of corporate America, *More Disabled Americans Are Employed, Thanks to Remote Labor*, reveals that if you let people work in a way that suits them, they just might do it. The heartwarming tale unfolds on the cutting-edge pages of Bloomberg, where readers are first challenged not to be robots before accessing such revolutionary insights. Comment sections are aflame with keyboard warriors heroically disputing whether human rights or corporate profits are the accidental hero of this narrative. Truly, it's a great day for armchair economists and amateur social justice advocates alike. 💼🎉
|
|
323 points by petethomas
2024-06-20T19:00:39 |
169 comments
|
|
| 9. |
|
▲ Show QN: Local Voice Assistant Using Ollama, Transformers and Coqui TTS Toolkit (github.com/mezbaul-h)
Show HN delivers again with a groundbreaking "Local Voice Assistant Using Ollama, Transformers and Coqui TTS Toolkit," because apparently the world was in dire need of yet another voice assistant. This time, it's local and cobbled together with the technological equivalent of duct tape and prayer. The innovator earnestly assures us they read every piece of feedback because nothing says "successful project" like desperately craving validation from internet strangers. Comments range from unbridled praise by those who've never touched a CLI to incisive critiques by armchair developers who believe they could rewrite the entire codebase over a weekend.
|
|
9 points by mezba
2024-06-20T22:48:40 |
0 comments
|
|
| 10. |
|
▲ Wc2: Investigates optimizing 'wc', the Unix word count program (github.com/robertdavidgraham)
In a world bogged down by high-speed internet and cutting-edge technology, one brave soul at GitHub decides it's time to hone the real issues: making 'wc', the Unix word count program, a tiny bit faster. Cue the parade! 🎉 In this thrilling blog post, we find our hero surrounded by legions of commenters who, instead of contributing meaningfully, argue passionately about the virtues of optimizing a tool that was perfectly adequate in 1971. Every keyboard warrior leaps at the opportunity to stamp their esoteric knowledge of C standards, invoking the ghosts of Kernighan and Ritchie. Because, as we all know, the fate of our digital world rests on squeezing out those last few microseconds.
|
|
161 points by PaulHoule
2024-06-20T13:54:51 |
104 comments
|
|
| 11. |
|
▲ Free software hijacked Philip Hazel's life (lwn.net)
**Real Lives Overshadowed by Regex: A Lament for Lost Years**
In a tale as old as time but as fresh as an unpatched server, Philip Hazel, a seemingly innocent software engineer, sacrifices the best years of his life shackled to the siren call of the Exim message transfer agent. Thousands of LWN subscribers nod sagely, lamenting over the keyboard warriors who sustain free software's soul-consuming ecosystem while simultaneously spamming the comment section with their vast expertise on regular expressions. Meanwhile, the rest of us mere mortals continue to question our life choices, wondering if perhaps a subscription to LWN at the "professional hacker" level, now with a 25% discount, is the key to immortalizing ourselves in the annals of FOSS folklore or merely another way to avoid real social interactions. 🖥️🔗💔
|
|
271 points by fanf2
2024-06-20T09:14:25 |
60 comments
|
|
| 12. |
|
▲ What is ZIRP, and how did it impact the startup world? (ycombinator.com)
On the digital pages of the illustrious ycombinator.com, Dalton Caldwell heroically attempts to explain ZIRP (Zero Interest Rate Policy) and its purported cataclysms in the startup ecosystem. In a dazzling display of over-simplification, Caldwell somehow links cheap money to the influx of artisanal coffee shops in San Francisco. The armchair economists of Hacker News eagerly pile on, each outdoing the next with half-baked insights about economic theory, as if the fate of free market capitalism depends on their profound comments under a blog post. Amidst the chaos, not a single reader's understanding is enhanced, but don't worry, ZIRP's implications are as clear as mud. 📉👩💻🚀
|
|
28 points by todsacerdoti
2024-06-20T20:31:40 |
4 comments
|
|
| 13. |
|
▲ How We Made the Deno Language Server Ten Times Faster (deno.com)
In a shocking turn of events, the developers behind Deno have discovered the 'delete' key, resulting in a feat of software engineering that makes the Deno Language Server almost as fast as a sedated sloth. Posted on June 20, 2024, the blog details arcane rituals like "refactoring" and "optimization," words which here seem to mean "making the code less embarrassingly slow." 🐌 Commenters, wide-eyed and lightly salivating, trip over themselves to praise the groundbreaking discovery that deleting useless code improves performance, while simultaneously planning their own GitHub forks that will, no doubt, add all the bloat back in. Stay tuned for next month’s revolutionary article: "How Compiler Errors Help Us Realize That Computers Are Hard."
|
|
3 points by mikece
2024-06-20T23:59:35 |
0 comments
|
|
| 14. |
|
▲ There are no particles, there are only fields (2012) (arxiv.org)
In a breathtaking leap that no one asked for, another physicist decides to ruin everyone's intuitive grasp of the universe by declaring that particles are just a bourgeoisie illusion and what we really have are fields. Thrilled by this revelation, the comment section becomes a battleground where retired engineers and freshmen physics majors duel with misunderstood Quantum Mechanics lectures they found on YouTube. Physics, a subject already as clear as mud, is further obfuscated by claims that we're actually just wading through fields of cosmic energy, or something. Delight in reading, if understanding less is your kind of fun. 🤯💫
|
|
15 points by primroot
2024-06-20T22:42:03 |
6 comments
|
|
| 15. |
|
▲ Small claims court became Meta's customer service hotline (engadget.com)
In an inspiring display of American resolve, Ray Palena heroically flies across the country to engage in the age-old tradition of battling a corporate Goliath in their own backyard: a small claims court. There, against the soulless backdrop of bureaucratic justice, Ray stands defiant, armed only with his righteousness and perhaps a misplaced sense of where customer service ends and legal action begins. Engadget's commentators rally behind him, their fingers warriors on keyboards, battling the existential angst of modern tech woes with spirited debates about... whether such trips earn airline miles. 🙄😂 Truly, when memes fail us, small claims courts do not. 🎭👨⚖️
|
|
301 points by jmsflknr
2024-06-20T17:37:47 |
176 comments
|
|
| 16. |
|
▲ NASA Releases Hubble Image Taken in New Pointing Mode Using Only Single Gyro (nasa.gov)
In a thrilling display of astronomical overachievement, NASA has somehow managed to take a picture with the Hubble Space Telescope using only a single gyro, much to the disbelief of everyone who thought it already used at least three by default. Various commenters, who obviously hold PhDs in armchair aerospace engineering from the University of Facebook, have already triumphed over the intricacies of space photography, suggesting ways to optimize orbital parameters using kitchen timers and duct tape. Don’t miss this breathtaking blend of sheer cosmic luck and human ingenuity, proving once again that yes, we can indeed put filters on space photos too. 🚀💫😂
|
|
232 points by isaacfrond
2024-06-19T07:53:34 |
125 comments
|
|
| 17. |
|
▲ Generating Audio for Video (deepmind.google)
At DeepMind, the wizards of techno-sorcery unveil their newest draw from the hat of unnecessarily intricate innovations: Generating Audio for Video. Watch in awe as computers learn to babble in sync with moving pixels, harnessing the dark forces of artificial intelligence to solve a problem no one knew existed. Meanwhile, in the bustling chat forums, armies of AI sycophants and grumpy audiophiles engage in immortal combat, debating whether it's AI-generated genius or just a synthesized smack in the face to real talent. The world waits with bated breath—or maybe it doesn't—while humanity marches one step closer to obsolescence, or to the next tech-induced headache. 🤖🎬🎧
|
|
9 points by rvnx
2024-06-20T22:23:12 |
0 comments
|
|
| 18. |
|
▲ The Shape of Information (kucharski.substack.com)
In this week's episode of *genuinely groundbreaking* insights, every data enthusiast's favorite blog, kucharski.substack.com, tackles the *monumental* conundrum: "The Shape of Information." Here, the author embarks on a philosophical ramble sportier than a drunk at a geometry conference, attempting to unravel whether information looks like a dodecahedron or a sad, forgotten birthday balloon. The eager commenters, trampling over each other in their virtual Converse, posit theories so profound you’ll worry they've escaped from a particularly low-security philosophy department. One zealous soul even quotes Proust – because, why not underscore your internet sophistication with a sprinkle of French literature in an information shape debate?
|
|
58 points by effect
2024-06-18T23:05:54 |
15 comments
|
|
| 19. |
|
▲ US Bans Kaspersky Software (wired.com)
In a bold move that surprises exactly nobody, the U.S. has decided to ban Kaspersicalypse Software, effectively pushing the big red button on cybersecurity Cold War 2.0. Wired delivers this exposé with the urgency of a snail on sedatives, breaking down complex political tech-drama for those who haven't been paying attention since 2017. Meanwhile, commenters transform into instant cyber-lawyers, tripping over themselves to explain why this *obviously unconstitutional, wrong-headed, and probably also a sign of the apocalypse* ban is either the best or worst thing ever, depending on which end of their mom’s basement they’re shouting from. ⚖️👩💻🔥
|
|
7 points by CharlesW
2024-06-21T00:29:06 |
0 comments
|
|
|
