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▲ EUCLEAK Side-Channel Attack on the YubiKey 5 Series (ninjalab.io)
In a shockingly unprecedented reveal that a JavaCard might just have a slight security hiccup, the internet's collective hive mind jumps into a frenzy because apparently, our beloved YubiKeys can be coaxed into spilling secrets if someone manages to, I don't know, steal it, peel it apart, understand quantum physics, and reassemble it flawlessly. Commenters, armed with an arsenal of partially relevant links and a dash of paranoia, worry about the inevitable theft of their vast treasures: cat pictures and unfinished novels stored in Google Drive. One enlightened soul suggests a revolutionary security measure: a smear of nail polish. Because, obviously, the biggest threat to security isn't the hackers; it's failing to accessorize properly. 🎨
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358 points by GTP
2024-09-03T12:54:47 |
138 comments
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| 2. |
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▲ Writing a book in the age of open source (incrementalforgetting.tech)
**Writing a book in the age of open source**
In the latest intellectual ellipse, a clamor buzzes on incrementalforgetting.tech about a cutting-edge approach to crafting tech books, presumably because using any older methods would just be barbaric in 2023. 📚 One commenter, drowning in self-importance, explains how his ergonomic throne and ASCII-fueled scribblings forge real dollars on the wild plains of Leanpub. Meanwhile, others chime in with their war stories of battling distraction, optimizing the perfect writing tech stack, and parsing the profound question of whether thinking really is faster than typing. Guess what? If your writing toolkit needs more configuration than the software you’re writing about, maybe — just maybe — you’re procrastinating. 🤔💻📉
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77 points by mooreds
2024-09-03T20:47:49 |
45 comments
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| 3. |
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▲ Chromatone – Visual Music Language (chromatone.center)
**Chromatone: Because Seeing is Believing in Technicolor Melodies**
In the latest episode of "Why Not?", Chromatone dares to reimagine music education by mixing Crayola into Beethoven's toolbox. Imagine a world where 'Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star' is not just heard but also seen in glorious shades of chartreuse and neon pink, because *clearly* what Mozart missed was a good light show. Forum scholars, in a dazzling parade of jargon-dropping, debate whether E-minor feels more like forest green or more like sea green, while practical musicians wonder why their new rainbow scores look like Skittles. If you've ever yearned to hear colors or see sounds, well, congratulations on your synesthesia, but also, check out Chromatone – where complexity meets color wheel, and everyone's still confused! 🎨🎵
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161 points by samdung
2024-09-03T15:54:37 |
36 comments
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| 4. |
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▲ Show QN: Hestus – AI Copilot for CAD (hestus.co)
**HN Discovers AI Again, Now for CAD**
Today on Hacker News, another groundbreaking revolution: Hestus – an AI Copilot that's going to save engineers from the mundane drudgery of CAD. Apparently, this AI miracle is automating tasks previously left to the somewhat capable hands of engineers who only had decades of experience and highly refined software suites developed since the 80s at their disposal. Commenters quickly chime in, one-upping each other with tales of "back in my day" and technical jargon, desperately trying to validate their CAD street cred. Meanwhile, Hestus quietly automates the least enjoyable parts of their jobs, because who needs expertise when you have AI? 🤖👷♂️
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132 points by kevinsane
2024-09-03T18:49:25 |
55 comments
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| 5. |
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▲ The Engineering of Landfills (practical.engineering)
In an excruciating attempt to educate digital dumpster divers on the evocative thrill of trash, Practical Engineering gives us the low-down on the innovative world of landfill majesty in "The Engineering of Landfills." The article, an epitome of literal waste exposition, thrillingly recounts half a century of Los Angeles' finest refuse achievements but, shockingly, forgets to applaud the Earth for not swallowing us whole as punishment. Amidst comments teeming with sudden landfill enthusiasts—because nothing says "exciting weekend read" like landfill tech debriefs—we see the rise of keyboard environmental engineers waxing eloquent on making energy from your discarded pizza boxes. Surely, with such expert commentary, the Puente Hills' dead dinosaurs can sleep easy knowing they're powering your Netflix binge with posthumous indignity. 🌍🗑️🔌
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273 points by impish9208
2024-09-03T16:40:51 |
191 comments
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| 6. |
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▲ Emerge Tools (YC W21) is hiring a senior front end engineer (emergetools.com)
In an intoxicating display of Silicon Valley redundancy, Emerge Tools—the latest YC-backed attempt to reinvent the wheel—is hiring a *senior front end engineer* 🔧💻. For anyone passionate about pushing pixels for a startup that promises the earth but will likely pivot to blockchain by Q3, this is your call to action! The comment section is a dazzling circus of the blind leading the blind, filled with buzzwords that do little to mask the existential dread of the tech-bubble workforce. Never miss a post or product update, indeed, because minuscule product changes need maximum notifications! 🚨🔄
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0 points by
2024-09-04T01:00:07 |
0 comments
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| 7. |
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▲ There's a place for everyone (experimental-history.com)
**Is Every Obscure Hobby a Job Waiting to Happen?**
The latest intellectual dumpster dive at experimental-history.com theorizes that every misfit has a misfit hole—yes, even you, with your obscure collection of limited edition Yu-Gi-Oh! napkins. Commenters, armed with their five-second attention spans, rush to confuse employment with existential fulfillment, sparking a delightful dumpster fire of misunderstandings about socio-economic realities and underwater pizza delivery economics. Meanwhile, someone seriously contemplates if their role as moderator of a now-defunct flaming forum could translate to a profitable real-world career. Spoiler: it can't, but don’t tell them—let them dream of a world where niche equals paycheck.
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37 points by yboulkaid
2024-09-01T11:34:22 |
26 comments
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| 8. |
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▲ Show QN: Repaint – a WebGL based website builder (repaint.com)
Welcome to the latest installment of Hacker News's collective delusion: Repaint 🎨, a WebGL-based website builder that promises to simplify the convoluted existence of web development, presumably allowing even your cat to effortlessly spin out interactive sites between naps. Giddy users babble about text rendering as if they've just cracked the Rosetta Stone, while the creator – braving brushes with madness over ligatures in Latin scripts – puffs up like a peacock over this Herculean effort. Meanwhile, someone’s already fearing the inevitable descent of this new tool into a cesspool of phishing scams and malware. Entrepreneurs and tech bros, welcome your new canvas overlords, and don't forget to add semantic ids to your nodes! Because, why not make it *even more* complex? 🎉🔧
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143 points by benshumaker0
2024-09-03T16:08:52 |
99 comments
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| 9. |
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▲ Synchronizing Pong to music with constrained optimization (victortao.substack.com)
In a stunning display of nerd cred, the internet has once again proven that anything, including the molasses-slow game of Pong, can be synchronized to music if you're willing to over-engineer it sufficiently. Users are tripping over themselves in awe, proposing to "enhance" old Atari games with musical cues, because nothing says innovation like teaching an AI to groove to an 8-bit rendering of Beethoven. Commenters reminisce about antique projects and obscure games where rhythm meets gaming, showcasing an almost religious zeal for complicating entertainment. One eager soul even dreams of retrofitting their dusty old MIDI player to join the fun, proving that nostalgia and confused ambition never really go out of style. 🎮🎶😂
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215 points by platers
2024-09-03T13:19:33 |
26 comments
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| 10. |
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▲ Solar will get too cheap to connect to the power grid (benjames.io)
**Hackernews Discovers Infinite Power, Still Complains About Costs**
Today in tech utopia, a blogger enlightens us with a revelation that solar panels, the almighty saviors of modern civilization, are about to become as affordable as the dirt they sometimes sit on. Subjects addressed span the mythical manufacturing simplicity of these "flat silicon pebbles" to their potential to summon unlimited power from the heavens, absolutely *free* of charge. Meanwhile, in the peanut gallery, confused keyboard warriors wax skeptical—fretting over ROI, deployment costs, and somehow turning excessive solar power into an apocalyptic economic scenario. Others fantasize about transforming deserts into verdant utopias or futuristic water worlds, all powered by our gloriously oversupplied solar grids. Collectively, they manage to simultaneously miss the point and prove it, showcasing that no tech advancement is too groundbreaking for a good old fashioned internet argument on viability and semantics.
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37 points by ben-james
2024-09-03T19:26:31 |
19 comments
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| 11. |
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▲ Howm: Personal Wiki for Emacs (github.com/emacs101)
**Howm: The Emacs Cult Strikes Back**
In the latest thrilling episode of "Elderly Tech Trends," Emacs users *clap* for the resurrection of Howm, a note-taking relic that turns text scribbling into an occult practice. Fans of Howm, deftly ignoring newer, shinier tools, pride themselves on preferring clunky "simplicity" and "Japanese engineering" 🍣 over actual usability. Critics, probably feeling left out from the emacs-versus-vim wars of yore, argue feebly over the superiority of markdown links, classic PKM tools, and the esoteric art of "not adding too many fields." Because, obviously, the real mark of professional productivity is how zealously you can reject any software made after 1995. 📜✨
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69 points by setopt
2024-09-03T19:11:26 |
10 comments
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| 12. |
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▲ Show QN: Epistolary – Respond to your emails in handwriting (github.com/j6k4m8)
Welcome to the latest Silicon Valley solution looking for a problem: **Epistolary**! Why burden yourself with the simplicity of typing when you can instead engage in the laborious pastime of handwriting emails on an overpriced e-ink tablet? Now, not only can you misunderstand emails, but you can also ensure the OCR misinterprets every word of your charmingly cursive reply. Commenters are thrilled: from requesting features to write in someone else’s handwriting (because forgery is *so* in this season) to the deep existential query of how a file transmits from tablet to server — it’s clear we are witnessing the pinnacle of first-world problem-solving. 😱📜✍️
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41 points by j6m8
2024-09-03T18:37:13 |
4 comments
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| 13. |
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▲ The Fourier Uncertainty Principles [pdf] (2021) (uchicago.edu)
In an electrifying display of academic verbosity, the latest paper from uchicago.edu resurrects the dusty Fourier Uncertainty Principles, delighting dozens. Readers leap into the comments, determined to flex their physics muscles, some drawing bewildering parallels to quantum mechanics that would make even Schrödinger's cat unsubscribe from their newsletters. One brave soul even attempts to shoehorn the Nyquist-Shannon sampling theorem into the conversation, because why discuss one complicated concept when you can awkwardly merge two? As the discussion spirals into the esoteric abyss, casual browsers regret their life choices and vow to stick to cat videos. 🙀🤷♂️
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57 points by mindcrime
2024-09-03T17:23:46 |
8 comments
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| 14. |
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▲ Hot Temperature and High Stakes Performance [pdf] (nd.edu)
Hackernews turns up the heat in a thrilling discussion about the latest PDF from Notre Dame. A groundbreaking revelation that participants might perform differently when it's hot – a concept *surely* no one has ever stumbled upon before. Commenters dive in, ignoring the paper to reminisce about their own air-conditioned home offices and how they single-handedly master thermodynamics to optimize their performance. Others hint at secret military studies, because nothing says "I'm smarter than you" like vague references to the Air Force. 🌡️💻🚀
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35 points by robg
2024-09-03T18:45:31 |
3 comments
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| 15. |
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▲ Ask QN: Who is hiring? (September 2024)
Title: Ask HN: Who is hiring? (September 2024)
Hacker News once again transforms into a delightful circus of recruitment theater with the "Who is hiring?" thread, where startup founders throwing their vague ideas at anyone who can code offer the rare opportunity to gamble with your career. On stage today is FormalStack, armed with a dizzying $700k of VC funny money, founders fresh out of Stanford, and a dream to rebuild computing itself. In the comments, the peanut gallery juggles skepticism and awe, while a brave soul with no relevant experience throws their hat into the ring for a job they just invented. Join the fun, risk your financial stability, and maybe help invent the future, or at least ensure the founders can pay rent until series A. 😎💸🚀
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340 points by whoishiring
2024-09-02T15:00:06 |
322 comments
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| 16. |
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▲ My Blog Engine Is the Erlang Build Tool (ferd.ca)
When Compilers Meet Hipsters: Blogging with Erlang
Who knew that using a compiler could make blogging hip? Behold the tech savant who harnesses the unbridled power of the Erlang compiler for a blog so minimal it barely exists. Meanwhile, enthusiasts applaud this ingenuity like cavemen discovering fire, sharing links to their own Rube Goldberg blogging setups. It’s a digital version of building a spaceship to cross the street.🚀⌨️💾
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117 points by billiob
2024-09-02T14:04:20 |
6 comments
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| 17. |
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▲ We built the city of Colombo in Cities:Skylines (github.com/team-watchdog)
Title: Hobbyist Urban Planners Rebuild Colombo in *Cities: Skylines*
In a stunning display of having way too much free time, team Watchdog has recreated Colombo in *Cities: Skylines*, because apparently Google Maps just isn’t enough for some people. Commenters, equally dazzled by the possibility of modeling every pigeon and pothole in their hometowns, swoop in with questions about the project's applicability to real-life city planning — ignoring the developers’ gentle reminder that, hey, this is still just a game. One earnest soul, puzzled by the notion of advocating for real urban planning changes based on videogame data, wonders aloud if they should just go ahead and write their own simulation engine. Meanwhile, everyone ignores the fact that this “meticulous” simulation can't predict tomorrow’s weather, let alone solve actual urban planning issues.
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13 points by icaruswept
2024-09-01T15:05:50 |
5 comments
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| 18. |
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▲ IBM 305 RAMAC and the 1960 Winter Olympics (pncnmnp.github.io)
In an earth-shattering blog post that melds technology with icy nostalgia, one nostalgic tech pilgrim recounts the summer pilgrimage to the Bay of Geek Dreams (Silicon Valley) to gaze upon relics such as the IBM 305 RAMAC. Bemoaning the lack of computer museums in Mumbai as if the closure of Paul Allen's tech shrine should lead to international mourning, the article balances on the fine edge of historical reverence and techie tourist tragedy. Meanwhile, commenters engage in the digital equivalent of comparing the size of vacuum tubes and transistors, fervidly discussing the storage capabilities of ancient tech as if it could help them download more personality. They wax poetic about massive storage costs, ineffective resource usage, and some idyllic world where software wasn’t devoured by its own bloat. Apparently, nostalgia isn’t just about missing the past; it’s about ignoring the fact that nobody really needs to see 5MB taking physical space anymore.
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76 points by pncnmnp
2024-09-03T12:57:19 |
12 comments
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| 19. |
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▲ Show QN: Shehzadi in Peril – My first ever game (shehzadi.vercel.app)
Another day on Hacker News, another ground-breaking debut of a game that will undoubtedly disrupt mobile entertainment as we know it: "Shehzadi in Peril." The prestigious comment section, a veritable gold mine of technical acumen and heartfelt nostalgia, explodes with feedback mostly stating the obvious: games should be fun and bugs are bad. Amidst praise for the art and casual nostalgia trips, our brave commenters dispense invaluable advice, like turning off your phone's rotation or, God forbid, adding a screenshot to capture the essence of the 2006 Java game vibe. Welcome to the front page of Hacker News, where every day is a throwback Thursday and your game is only a rotation away from oblivion.
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80 points by sh4jid
2024-09-01T08:19:35 |
41 comments
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| 20. |
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▲ Mondragon as the new city-state (elysian.press)
**Mondragon: The Utopia You've Never Heard Of**
In a thrilling exposé that skips over historic examples like Rojava because who needs comprehensive analysis, "Mondragon as the new city-state" invites us to marvel at *cooperatives* – apparently the cure for modern civilization's ills. Our bright-eyed commenters chime in with a mix of naive optimism and a crash course in *anarcho-syndicalism*, a term that 99% of them definitely didn't Google three minutes before posting. Between suggesting everyone should cough up a dollar for digital utopia and drawing dubious parallels between worker co-ops and idol groups, it's a rollicking intellectual playground where historical ignorance meets unchecked enthusiasm. 🎉😄
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147 points by jinjin2
2024-09-03T19:06:26 |
140 comments
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