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▲ Started a guide to writing FUSE filesystems in Python (gwolf.org)
**Another Glorious Day at the FUSE Conference: Python Meets Electrical Engineering 101**
A professor, not "really that much of a Python guy," decides to bless the Chicago Python User Group with a discussion about a collegiate-level, "toy" filesystem, birthed in the academic wilds of Mexico's UNAM. Because nothing screams 'Thank you for waiting two years' like an introduction to student project code with 👏 *character encoding issues* 👏. Meanwhile, the comment section devolves into a den of would-be filesystem enthusiasts, swapping tales of ZFS snapshots and 9P protocols, with that exploratory glee reserved for those who find joy in making directories represent Jira issues. Clearly, the internet is where filesystem dreams go to get complicated. ⛓️💻⛓️
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141 points by levlaz
2024-10-11T18:29:40.000000Z |
31 comments
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| 2. |
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▲ Lm.rs: Minimal CPU LLM inference in Rust with no dependency (github.com/samuel-vitorino)
**Title: Another Day, Another Minimalist Rust Project Fails to Intimidate the Layman**
In a bold move that shocks absolutely nobody, Samuel Vitorino pops onto GitHub to introduce lm.rs, a project that allows enthusiastic but oddly naive developers to run language model inference on CPUs using Rust—a decision as painful as listening to nails on a chalkboard. Riveted by the way Rust complicates the originally simple task, Samuel declares, with the swagger of a newbie, that he's riding on the coattails of smarter projects like Karpathy's llama2.c. Commenters, in an unparalleled display of ignorance, swoon over the "impressive" CPU gymnastics on their overpriced MacBooks, while juggling download commands that would make a sysadmin weep. One brave soul questions the model's intelligence, sparking a debate that deteriorates into a sad lesson on floating point precision—because obviously, what this world needs is more arguments about why your fantasy numbers don't add up in a fantasy project.
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183 points by littlestymaar
2024-10-11T16:46:54.000000Z |
42 comments
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| 3. |
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▲ Conway's Gradient of Life (hardmath123.github.io)
**Conway's Gradient of Life: A Modern Saga of Computational Overkill**
In an awe-inspiring display of academic overreach, a blogger revives Conway's Game of Life only to turn it into a portrait-creation tool that kind-of-sort-of-looks-like-John Conway—if you squint hard enough and disregard your sense for detail. 🧐 Commenters dive headfirst into the minutia, tossing around phrases like "Markov random fields" and "gradient ascent," probably more to flex their Comp Sci degrees than to shed actual light on the spectacle. Meanwhile, a lone hero suggests flipping pixels randomly could achieve the same results, unwittingly highlighting the absurdity of overengineering simpler problems. 🔄 Oh, and someone made a crossword puzzle related to this, because surely, that's what was missing from this scholarly circus. 🤹♂️
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193 points by networked
2024-10-09T09:45:51.000000Z |
14 comments
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| 4. |
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▲ Working from home is powering productivity (imf.org)
**Working from Home: The Economic Miracle or Just Another Excuse to Avoid Pants?**
In an unparalleled feat of economic wizardry, a recent puff piece on imf.org promises that working from home (WFH) isn't just for avoiding pants, but is actually turbocharging productivity! The author blasts through decades of economic gloom with the cheerful revelation that pandemics are great for business, provided everyone stays home. Meanwhile, the comment section devolves into a conspiracy theorist’s paradise, where CEOs are either puppeteered by sinister real-estate moguls or just trying to dodge embarrassing lease breakups. Clearly, the future of work is less about economic evidence and more about whether your CEO’s golf buddy thinks Zoom meetings count as real work.
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261 points by rwmj
2024-10-11T20:18:30.000000Z |
132 comments
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| 5. |
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▲ Windows dynamic linking depends on the active code page (nullprogram.com)
**Reality Distortion: Windows Code Page Chaos**
Ah, the blissful ballet of bit-bending brought on by Windows' enduring love affair with code pages! Discover the thrill of dynamic linking as it pirouettes to your locale's tune, where DLL names morph based on cultural whims. Our hero, nullprogram.com, embarks on a daring expedition to conjure DLLs from the ether, armed with gnarly encodings and a pinch of CPP macro magic. Meanwhile, the commentariat flexes its 90s programming muscles, dropping nostalgic C macro knowledge bombs, while barely concealing their disgust at Microsoft's "regional" mishaps, linking failures to shattered confidence in enterprise-grade solutions. 👏👏👏 Will Windows ever learn? (Spoiler: No. No, it will not.)
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78 points by signa11
2024-10-07T23:36:42.000000Z |
14 comments
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| 6. |
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▲ "Bad Apple" in Minecraft (purplesyringa.moe)
**Bad Apple Crawls Its Way to Minecraft – But Why?**
In yet another inevitable twist of fate, the demoscene sensation Bad Apple!! finds a new home in Minecraft, because apparently, we haven't seen it in enough random places. Watch in muted awe as someone decides that pixels crafted from virtual dirt are the next big canvas for this pixelated dance. Comment sections turn into mini-Touhou encyclopedias, with debates on grayscale vs. black-and-white video frames providing everyone's much needed daily dose of pedantry. Exciting times on purplemagenta.whatever! 🙄
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187 points by purplesyringa
2024-10-10T13:02:36.000000Z |
26 comments
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| 7. |
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▲ Show QN: I made a URL expander because short links are too mainstream (urlshortenersaresoyesterdaytrythisamazin...)
In a world where brevity is the soul of wit, Hacker News proudly buckles under the weight of its own URL "expander" that turns tweets into treatises longer than *War and Peace*. One brave coder thrusts against the societal currents of efficiency with https://urlshortenersaresoyesterdaytrythisamazingsuperlongurlexpander.site, and the community, largely incapable of determining JavaScript from a Java coffee cup, wades in. Commenters rally, enduring existential browser crises and sparring with robotic identity accusations, while clumsily navigating URLs that could double as novel titles. Meanwhile, echoes of "same," "hilarious," and desperate cries for technological nostalgia festoon the comment field, crafting a tech dystopia that even George Orwell couldn't have predicted. 🤖💔📜
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66 points by error404x
2024-10-08T18:23:26.000000Z |
38 comments
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| 8. |
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▲ The $550M Question: How Does David Geffen Hall Sound? (nytimes.com)
In the latest victory for overpriced rectangles, David Geffen Hall reopens, now lavishly flushed with $550 million, presumably counting for each glossy tile. The glitterati rejoice as the New York Times audibly gasps, "How does it sound?" Unsurprisingly, acoustic critics and trust fund babies crowd the comments, flexing their golden ears and debating whether it's Beethoven or the bourgeoisie that truly echoes through the hall. 🎼👂 Meanwhile, regular humans query if $550M might have also fixed a subway or two.
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3 points by Thevet
2024-10-09T03:04:04.000000Z |
0 comments
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| 9. |
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▲ An exoskeleton let a paralyzed man walk, then its maker refused repairs (washingtonpost.com)
In a stunning display of corporate compassion, Lifeward (formerly known as GiveUsYourMoney Robotics) has boldly refused to repair the exoskeleton of a paralyzed man, because making money is obviously more important than mobility. Commenters, those paragons of insight, suggest the government should intervene, because apparently private companies are as reliable as the weather forecast. One brainiac queries why health insurance doesn't just handle it, surely highlighting their nuanced understanding of medical insurance policies. And, of course, several commenters blame the media for not uncovering the grand FDA conspiracy behind exoskeleton maintenance. What a time to be alive and paralyzed! 🎉😑
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98 points by paulpauper
2024-10-11T21:03:50.000000Z |
52 comments
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| 10. |
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▲ Understanding the Limitations of Mathematical Reasoning in LLMs (arxiv.org)
**Mocking the Mathematical Misunderstandings**
Another week, another chaotic clash between human intellect and machine "reasoning" on the internet's most forehead-slapping digital science gathering, arXiv. Commenters fervently dissect the apparent reasoning skills of LLMs with the passion of a Star Wars fan explaining why the prequels were misunderstood, leading to groundbreaking equating of AI's performance with that of bewildered high school students. Perhaps the most hilarious outbreak of pseudo-intellectual ramblings comes from comparing LLMs like GPT-4o to average American teenagers, sent to academic battle with chains of logic so weak, they couldn’t puzzle out how to escape a wet paper bag. While one insightful so-called expert joyously proclaims that LLMs are replicating the intellectual prowess of 11th graders, the rest of the internet proceeds to miss the point entirely by focusing on whether academic struggles entail actual reasoning or are just shiny examples of computational parlor tricks. 🤦♂️
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157 points by hnhn34
2024-10-11T11:55:06.000000Z |
195 comments
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| 11. |
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▲ How London's Crystal Palace was built so quickly (arstechnica.com)
In a groundbreaking revelation that will surely disrupt our daily lives, scholars have unearthed the *shocking* truth behind the Crystal Palace's speedy assembly: standardized screw threads. Who knew? 🙄 At the thriving hub of 19th-century innovation, also known as the Great Exhibition, it apparently took more than big ideas and thicker mustaches to get things done—it took screws that matched! Elsewhere in internet land, comment sections are erupting in mindless debates on whether it’s the threads or the thread counts that truly built an empire. Historical engineering enthusiasts rejoice, your moment in the sun has arrived – try not to screw it up!
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7 points by mhb
2024-10-08T12:46:13.000000Z |
0 comments
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| 12. |
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▲ Show QN: I made an Ollama summarizer for Firefox (addons.mozilla.org)
Welcome to the latest unnecessary digital crutch for the literate but lazy: the *Ollama Summarizer* for Firefox. It magically transforms verbose web pages into bite-sized mush, perfect for those who can't bother reading more than a tweet's worth at a time. Commenters, swapping war stories from the front lines of plugin development, argue over the optimal settings for their AI overlords. Meanwhile, a rogue philosopher questions the existential plight of feeding rich prose to the cold, unfeeling algorithms. Is it efficiency, or just the internet devouring its own tail again? 🙄
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47 points by tcsenpai
2024-10-11T15:45:48.000000Z |
9 comments
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| 13. |
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▲ Io_uring and seccomp (2022) (0x74696d.com)
**Today in the World of Overhyped Kernel Features**
In a daring leap of "innovation," the Linux kernel now includes something called io_uring, which is just a fancy way to tell your computer to do multiple things at once without checking back every nanosecond. Users and developers, equipped with the attention span of caffeinated squirrels, rally around this shiny new toy which bravely bypasses decades of security paradigms via seccomp—because why bother with security when your code can run a millisecond faster? As a bonus, the comment section is adorned with an Olympic-level mental gymnastics competition, as various technologists try to defend, dismantle, or downright confuse each other about whether this kernel magic is the highway to performance or just another security dumpster fire. Meanwhile, Docker and Google quietly block io_uring in their environments, rather like adults discreetly turning off the stove when the children are playing with matches. 🚒🔥
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53 points by pncnmnp
2024-10-09T14:42:39.000000Z |
9 comments
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| 14. |
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▲ Run Llama locally with only PyTorch on CPU (github.com/anordin95)
**Title: CPU-Powered Llama: The Eco-Friendly Paperweight**
Today in GitHub theatrics, an optimistic soul attempts to run the digital equivalent of a hibernating bear on a calculator. The "genius" project invites us to "peel back the layers of the onion and other gluey-mess" to understand LLMs better without the wizardry of GPUs. Commenters, in a miraculous display of missing the point, argue over API merits, complaining about licensing violations that nobody remembers, with one maverick entirely giving up on GPU because a new CLI chatbot has syntax highlighting. Meanwhile, the GitHub repo becomes a makeshift therapist's couch where programmers air grievances over the inefficiency of their vintage hardware. 🌍💻🔥
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120 points by anordin95
2024-10-08T01:45:14.000000Z |
22 comments
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| 15. |
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▲ Nobel Peace Prize for 2024 awarded to Nihon Hidankyo (nobelprize.org)
In a shocking twist absolutely no one saw coming, the 2024 Nobel Peace Prize has been awarded to Nihon Hidankyo. To commemorate this, historical bystanders from the internet enthusiastically parrot secondhand nuclear tales that "surprisingly" involve their grandfathers. The stage is set for a profound display of "my ancestor was there too" theater, featuring an oscilloscope of dubious memory and forensic examination of bones with a hint of blue. Meanwhile, enthusiasts cling to internet threads as if they're the warp and weft of historical accuracy itself. Fascinating, or merely another round of atomic ancestry bingo? 💣🎰
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237 points by danielskogly
2024-10-11T09:01:54.000000Z |
311 comments
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| 16. |
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▲ Why do systems fail? Tandem NonStop system and fault tolerance (erlang-solutions.com)
**Why Systems Fail: The NonStop Parade of Nostalgia and Neglect**
In a world where "fault tolerance" sounds more like a relationship requirement than a tech specification, enthusiasts of the old Tandem NonStop system get their kicks by reminiscing over complexities like "databases on raw disks" because, who needs modern filesystems when you can live on the edge of obsolescence? Commenters dive into a nostalgia-fueled debate, comparing archaic systems and lamenting the unavailability of ECC RAM on desktops, because everyone knows the fate of the free world hinges on error-checking memory chips. Meanwhile, Tandem’s technology, in all its relic glory, survives under HP’s care, masquerading as 'innovation' in a HPE brochure filed under 'vintage charm’. Let's all hold a candlelight vigil for system architectures so good they needed to be rescued from the technological equivalent of a yard sale. 🕯️📼👴🏻
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44 points by PaulHoule
2024-10-11T17:10:49.000000Z |
15 comments
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| 17. |
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▲ Gleam: A Basic Introduction (peq42.com)
In the latest episode of "Look! I Found Another Programming Language!," the tech savants over at peq42.com bravely navigate the treacherous waters of Gleam, a language somewhat reminiscent of Ruby, but with enough quirks to give a seasoned coder permanent eyebrow twitches. Commenters, in an adorable display of naivety, toggle between marveling at the ease of transpilation and waxing poetic about the mystical properties of Erlang’s runtime - because clearly, what the programming world lacks is more underdog tales about abstract syntax trees. One bright spark notes the lack of direct compilation to BEAM bytecode as a dealbreaker, while others energetically nod at the compiler’s output like it's the first time they’ve seen code turn into other code. Spoiler: it transpiles, just like their caffeine-fueled hope into disillusionment. 💻🌀🤦♂️
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70 points by Alupis
2024-10-11T18:57:33.000000Z |
28 comments
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| 18. |
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▲ How long til we're all on Ozempic? (asteriskmag.com)
In a thrilling exposé, asteriskmag.com plunges into the heartland of America's waistline woes with "How long til we're all on Ozempic?" Here, the lands of oversized portions meet the New Frontier of pharmaceutical salvation, because, as history has proved, why fix societal lifestyle degradation when you can dish out new drugs? Ozempic emerges as our newest knight in shimmering syringe, promising to slim down the chunk of Americans bulkier than a Costco on a Saturday morning. Meanwhile, the enlightened commentariat delves deep, debating whether this magic injectable is the beacon of hope or just another capitalist crutch bound to be demonized when the next heart palpitation hits the fan. 🤡💉🇺🇸
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258 points by thehoff
2024-10-11T17:06:30.000000Z |
1009 comments
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| 19. |
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▲ "Begin disabling installed extensions still using Manifest V2 in Chrome stable" (chrome.com)
**Chrome Shuts Down Old Tech; Users Cling to the Past**
In a bold move to obsolete technology no one apparently needs, Google announces the slow death of Manifest V2 extensions in Chrome, effectively forcing five users to upgrade their browser tools. Meanwhile, in comment land, users rebel against change by praising Firefox, which clings to outdated tech like a nostalgic hoarder. Cue scattered discussions about Vivaldi and Brave's uncertain commitments, as keyboard warriors speculate wildly and prepare their digital pitchforks. Chrome moves forward; commenters remain steadfastly in 2015. 😭🔧💻
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345 points by freedomben
2024-10-11T14:20:26.000000Z |
318 comments
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| 20. |
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▲ Hamming AI (YC S24) Is Hiring a Product Engineer (ycombinator.com)
The tech elite have once again descended from their ergonomic workspaces to solve a problem no one knew existed. Hamming AI, a startup daring to boldly go where only a few hundred others have gone before, is on the prowl for a Product Engineer. Their revolutionary approach? Provide AI solutions indistinguishable from those any undergraduate with a TensorFlow tutorial could muster. Comments are a dumpster fire of buzzwords hurled by wannabe disruptors, each vying for the chance to tout their own superficial understanding of AI. Join now to build another forgettable product while passionately arguing about which JavaScript framework is more "scalable"! 🚀💻
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0 points by
2024-10-11T17:29:14.000000Z |
0 comments
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